You know the girl I’m talking about, right?

The one with the winter coat on in April?

Guess what? 

While she may be quiet in class, that coat — the one with the grimy cuffs and the hood that she turns into a cave the moment she sits down in your classroom —  is speaking loud and clear.

Need proof?  Check out this image that’s making the rounds in Twitter:

So instead of getting all cranked up because she’s wearing the same coat for the forty-third straight day or because you’ve told her to put it away over and over again and she still won’t listen, dig a little deeper.

Because that coat isn’t a sign of a kid who is disobedient or irresponsible or quirky or just too darn lazy to change their clothes each morning.  And it’s not a sign of parents who clearly don’t care that their child is coming to school every day with a poor attitude and a dirty jacket.

It’s a sign of a kid who is hurting in some way.

Maybe that hurt was caused by you.  Maybe you’ve failed to create a learning space that is safe for every student.  Maybe your words and actions have made her feel like an “other.”  Someone who is less than.  Someone who doesn’t belong or who can’t earn your recognition and respect.  Someone that you have given up on.

Maybe that hurt was caused by the other students in your classroom or your school.  Maybe they have turned her into a target.  Maybe she’s become a punching bag, taking shots from everyone all the time because she’s different in some way.  Maybe she’s hiding in her hood because it’s her only hope of making it through the day unscathed.

Or maybe that hurt has been caused by a lifetime of adverse childhood experiences.   Maybe she’s struggling with physical or emotional neglect at home.  Maybe she’s seen her mother physically or verbally assaulted.  Maybe her family has gone through a brutal divorce and she thinks that she’s the reason her mother and father aren’t together anymore.

Whatever the cause, she needs you. 

She may not have said that out loud, but her coat is telling you everything that you need to know.

#trudatchat

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Related Radical Reads:

https://buildingconfidentlearners.com/2017/08/27/three-promises-im-making-to-the-parents-of-quirky-kids/

https://buildingconfidentlearners.com/2016/07/02/simple-truth-kids-want-to-be-noticed/

https://buildingconfidentlearners.com/2017/11/17/simple-truth-trying-kids-need-love-too/