I think most teachers know that building belonging — a sense of community between the kids in your classes or on your hallways or in your school — is essential to creating the kinds of spaces where genuine learning really happens. That’s nothing new, is it?
What IS new is the incredibly lonely world that we are all living in.
Consider these stats, which I found in a recent Fast Company article on the community building efforts of the biggest brands:
- 89% of people used a cell phone during their last social interaction. 82% felt it degraded the conversation.
- 40% of Americans identify as lonely; up from 1 in 10 in the 1970s.
- One in four Americans have no trusted confidante; up from 1 in 10 in 1985.
- Less than half of American kids live in a traditional family home; a big decline in family households since the 1970s.
- There’s been a 40% decline in standard measures of empathy since the 1990s.
- There’s been a 24% rise in suicides between 1999 and 2014.
- Only about half of Americans trust their neighbors, and even fewer younger and more urban people trust their neighbors.
That’s shocking stuff, right?
But it resonates. I’d identify myself as lonely, I think we live in a world with far less empathy than necessary, and I don’t know or trust my neighbors. And my guess is that many of my students and their families would fit in the exact same categories.
Which makes the community building efforts of individual teachers and entire school faculties even MORE important.
Human beings are inherently social creatures. We thrive on connections. We thrive on belonging. Our happiness depends on it. As Sebastian Junger wrote in Tribe:
“We have a strong instinct to belong to small groups defined by clear purpose and understanding–tribes.This tribal connection has been largely lost in modern society, but regaining it may be the key to our psychological survival.
“Whatever the technological advances of modern society – and they’re nearly miraculous – the individualized lifestyles those technologies spawn seem to be deeply brutalizing to the human spirit.”
Schools — along with churches and other community service organizations — really ARE perfectly suited for developing the kind of tribal connections that are “the key to our psychological survival.”
Need proof?
Then check out the recommendations that Fast Company author Sebastian Buck gives to the brands that he advises:
Although there are some examples of highly engaged communities being developed via technology (e.g., Peloton riders), when it comes to belonging, real connection will most likely come from in-person interaction in real life. But having physical space is not enough: Brands should create spaces, experiences, products, and services that deliberately foster the conditions for diverse people coming together in respectful environments for shared experiences.
Now let me rewrite that for you:
But having physical space is not enough. Schools should create spaces, experiences and services that deliberately foster the conditions for diverse people coming together in respectful environments for shared experiences.
Are you doing that in your communities?
If not, you should be. The simple truth is that if we are deliberate , we can be so much more than the place where kids go to get an education. We can be the place where diverse families come together to BELONG.
That matters, y’all.
