Dear American Readers:  I have troubling news.

We LOST the Anthem Smackdown bet.

#didNOTseethatcoming

Now I know what you’re thinking:  “We hit the freaking goalpost on an empty net shot” and “Who knew the Bolshoy Ice Dome was hidden in the heart of Saskatchewan” ran straight through my hockey-addled mind and out my Cheese Doodlin’ mouth more than once in the past two days.

And like you, I’ve spent the past few hours racking my brains to figure out how we could lose BOTH the Men’s and Women’s games.  Could it have been the warm conditions on the alpine courses?  (Nope.  That was our skiing excuse).  How about the crappy judges in the Ice Dancing competition?  (Nope. They were on our side).  If ONLY we didn’t wear those Under Armor uniforms.  (We didn’t). Maybe the stray dogs kept our guys and gals up all night?  (Let’s not go there).

The simple truth is that we lost — and we lost bad.

So we have to start singing.  It’s the right thing to do.  And it’s the only way that we can redeem ourselves in the eyes of the ice-breathing lunatics that ARE Canadian hockey fans!

Here’s the plan:

 Either working alone or with partners of your choosing, record a video where you are singing the Canadian National Anthem.

Think about involving your kids — they really ARE cuter than you.  Also, think about putting your own twist on the singing.  Love to rap?  Then rap the anthem.  Classically trained in opera?  Get your Luciano on.  Play the kazoo like a king?  Drop it like it’s hot.  Don’t be afraid to have fun here.  Let’s make people smile.

Need a sample of what’s possible?  Here’s a video I recorded with my daughter today.  Believe me:  It was awesome.

Feel free to sing with each other, too. For example, I might get a Google Hangout together with Paul Cancellieri, Philip Cummings and Brett Clark simply because we are already in an Eddie Money cover band together.

We’re NOT going to try to get all 20 of us together to sing synchronously, though.  While that sounded like a good plan at first, I can’t imagine how hard it will be to find one time where everyone can gather given our schedules and our time zones.

When your video is done — and the deadline is Saturday March 1st — get it posted to YouTube and tagged #anthemsmackdown.  Also, drop the direct link to the video to me here in the comment section or through Twitter.

I will pull all the videos submitted into a YouTube playlist for the viewing pleasure of the crazy Canucks who have been blowing up my Twitterstream today clamoring for our digital blood.  If I can find the time, I’ll also pull several choice clips into one mashed-up bit of Canadian Anthem goodness.

Finally, whether you are Canadian or American, leave me a comment below if you’d be interested in attending a World Premiere Screening of our #anthemsmackdown mashup on Saturday, March 22nd at 3 PM EST in a Google Hangout.

If there are enough people who want to get together to have a bit of fun, I’ll set us up with a Hangout. To be honest, I’d love to spend a few minutes laughing at our anthem renditions, too!  It’s better than crying over the bad hockey.

Lemme know what y’all think,

Bill

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Related Radical Reads:

Random Acts of Patriotism (or Man Up, Canada).